3/30/2014- “Suddenly…He’s Gone”

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Mikey,

I’m hurt. I’m so hurt that it’s hard to breathe. I’m actually fuming mad. This guy seemed perfect for me. We even went on four dates. Now it’s been a week and half and he hasn’t called, texted, or anything. I know he’s okay because he’s tweeting and updating his Facebook with photos. I sent him a message but he removed me from his friends’ list. I can’t figure out for the life of me what I did wrong. Why would he just cut me off like this? Is it wrong to go by his house and try to talk to him? How do I get through this?

-Anonymous

***Anonymous,  I can sense your pain, frustration, and confusion. Take it from someone who knows being cut off without explanation is hurtful.  I have to tell you to move on. Do not blame yourself for any of what’s happened. His failure to be a decent human being and let you know he’s not into you speaks volumes about his character–or the lack thereof.  DO NOT GO TO HIS HOME. You will be trespassing and come off as crazy and desperate. Dating is hard, and at times daunting. Just think of this as a learning lesson putting you one step closer to the guy you’re meant to be with.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

3/30/2014- “These Insecure Ass Girls!”

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Hey Mikey!

Yo is it me or are women just a bunch of insecure ass girls. Every woman I’ve ever been with has some hang up. Where should I be looking if I want to meet a woman with no insecurities.  The mistrust,  desperation, and anxiousness I sense from a lot of them is a turn off. Any pointers?

-Breathing Easy

***Breathing Easy,  if you’d like pointers on where to find a place where there are no insecure women allow me to point you towards Mars. Humanity and insecurity go hand in hand. There is not, has not, nor will there ever be a human being without some insecurity.  I figure it is God’s way of reminding us He is God and we are merely mortal.  I agree, to a degree, some people’s insecurities are crippling and nauseating but they all have a cause. The trick is to learn what you can and cannot deal with and then balancing all that with your needs and wants from that particular person. For instance if some woman’s insecurity is her need to be in a relationship don’t try just being her friend. Neither of you will get what you want, and it will all end disastrously. Lastly, stop with the generalizations there are just as many insecure men (this includes you and I) as there are women. Stereotyping is NEVER a good look.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

3/30/2014- “Neckbones & Chitlins”

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Mikey,

My son is starting to get on my last nerves. Since he came home from school he’s been been borderline boojie. He doesn’t dress the same, wants turkey everything, and wouldn’t eat my mother’s food. Saying he don’t eat no Neckbones,  chitlins, or hamhocks. I could tell it hurt her feelings. He apologized to her but I can’t get him to alter his behavior. I miss my country little boy.  What should I do?

-Country Mama

***Country Mama, part of going away to college is exploring and learning more about yourself and the world.  Your son will undoubtedly change. Most of those changes will be for the better. However, the issue here isn’t the change in his palate, it’s his demeanor you no longer prefer. I suggest you sit down and calmly talk to him about how you feel. He’s not a lost cause as he did apologize to his grandmother. You have to realize your country little boy may very soon be a city strolling man. Adjust your expectations realistically and accordingly.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

Restaurant Reviews- “Twain’s Billiards & Taps”

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As a native Georgian it bewilders me as to why I don’t know of all the treasures hidden in my city. Some of these treasures are historical sites, major business, theme parks, and restaurants.  Of these treasures I find the restaurants to be the most alluring. You might think that’s because I get to feed my face, but you’d be wrong. The varying crowds, unique dishes, and ambience of each restaurant tells an eclectic story compelled by both the employees and patrons of these sites. Of these aforementioned sites, Twain’s, stands heads and shoulders over its competition.

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Twain’s is a bar, restaurant, and pool hall located in the heart of downtown Decatur. I was referred to this little delight by my youngest sister on one of our late night outings. I have to say I was skeptical at first. The only time I’ve ever really ventured to that are for food was at the local Taco Mac. Needless to say I was presently surprised by the ingenuity and originality of the restaurany, and not for its menu, but for its set up. Immediately when you enter in to your right is a live band, then to your left is a fully stocked bar, a little further in are the booths, stand alone tables, and pool tables.  All is made of wood, giving the place an earthy feeling. However, I didn’t realize the most interesting aspect of the restaurant until we began to order. They brew their own beer on site! In fact,  the back of the restaurant houses a brewery! I am not really a beer fan but this reason alone makes this location explicitly more interesting.  Never worry guys, you won’t have to deal with “the less than pleasurable people” of the metropolitan area; the crowd is a pleasant mix of college students and young working couples looking to relax. I definitely recommend it as an excellent place for a date.

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Twain’s menu is simple and somewhat reminiscent of Taco Mac’s.  However, the portions, when it comes to their burgers and fries, surpass their sports bar counterpart.  Although I’m still disappointed with myself for not knowing of this “diamond in the rough” spot earlier I definitely plan on making up lost time. This weekend I’ll be heading back with a few friends in tow.  I think we just found a new hangout spot and a half pound burger to die for!

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3/27/2014- “12 & Gay”

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Mikey,

My son, age 12, just told his father and I that he is gay. I thought he was joking at first until he told me about a boy he has a crush on in his class. I simply thought they were just good friends. I’ve even let him spend the night at his house. I feel like we should get him some counseling, but my fiancé (His father, long story)is adamantly against it. He has a gay older brother and doesn’t feel like there’s anything wrong with it. I don’t know how I feel, but I know if I can help it I don’t want my son to be gay. I don’t really think he knows what he wants at twelve, nor should he have the right to choose something like this. My fiancé has called me a bigot because of how I feel. Am I? I’d like to feel like I’m being a concerned mother rather than a closed minded moron. My parents are an interracial couple so I don’t see how I could come off as being prejudiced

-P. Leery

***P. Leery, you are not a bigot. You are, however, misinformed. I have no doubt this has come as a shocker to you. I’ve heard of individuals coming out as teenagers, but never at the cusp of adolescence.  It is a sign of the times I’d say. However,  many gay people and have said they’ve always known they were attracted to the same sex, some said they knew as young as five and six, but didn’t act on these feelings until they were much older. So there really is a possibility your son knows what he likes. I’d advise you to give this some time, and to not mistreat or bar him from anything any other average twelve year old boy should be doing. This includes the occasional sleepover. Just because he’s gay does not mean he’s after every guy or vice versa. I also advise you and his father to sit down with his uncle. I’m sure he can offer insight into how he’s feeling. I’ve said this in previous posts, the world will fear and hate him,  but home should be safe for him.  Make that safe place with you. Lastly, your I doubt anyone chooses to be gay. The acts of sexual intimacy with someone of the same sex are surely by choice, the romantic and emotional feelings tied to them are not. Remember he’s your son before he’s anything. His sexuality is the smallest part of him.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

3/26/2014- “You Hold The Key (Unlocking The Diamond Gate”

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Hey Mikey,

I keep running into a speed bump when it comes to making friends and long term relationships.  Everyone I attempt to befriend or date says I’m distant and guarded. I’ve tried coming off like I’m not but I just can’t seem to change people’s perception of me. Even by mother says I’m that way. She suggests it’s because of my father.  He left us when I was three and I’ve never seen or heard from him again. I heard from a friend of yours you once had an issue with letting your own guard down. How did you overcome it?

-Anonymous

***Anonymous,  the mind is like a grand diamond gate and through it are the paths to every aspect of your being. Lowering this gate is synonymous with letting your guard down.  I suggest you do two things that helped me. The first being meditation. Learning to clear your mind and focus within unlocks and long bound truths. There are books and teachers that can help you master this. I myself meditate daily. Second, seek professional help. Sometimes we cannot access answers to the questions within ourselves without someone who knows the workings of the mind. Trust me psychotherapy doesn’t mean you’re crazy. It means you care just as much about your mental and emotional well being as you do your physical one. Remember there’s no barrier you can’t overcome given the proper tools–even when that barrier faces you daily in the mirror.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

3/26/2014- “Rogue”

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Hey Mikey,

Hey I need your help. I’m really into this girl! I mean she could be the one.  We’ve been together for almost a year now and I love spending time with her and just being around her in general. But there’s a “but;”she won’t let me touch her and she barely let’s me kiss her. She says she’s attracted to me, it’s not a religious or spiritual thing, and that she’s not a virgin but claims she isn’t quite so comfortable with intimacy with anyone.  I’m trying to be as understanding as possible, but after almost ten months of just pecks, cuddling, and holding hands I’m at my wit’s end. I need help getting her in the mood. Anything you can suggest?

- Blue91

***Blue91, you make your girl sound like Rogue from the X-Men.  I sense there’s something going on here that she just isn’t telling you. Do you know if she’s ever been raped or violated?  Lack of sexual desire is sometimes a side effect of such terrible acts. I think you should tell her how you feel and see what she discloses.  I can understand your frustration but if she’s “the one” then this warrants patience and answer to her behavior. Sex isn’t the most important part of a relationship, but is still important nonetheless. No matter what her answer I suggest you both speak to a professional relationship counselor. Good luck.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡