11/8/2015- “No Chill”

no chill hey mikey atl

Hey Mikey,

I have been trying to reunite my family for the last five years. Since my parents’ divorce they have only been in the same room once; and that’s when my twin brother and I graduated from high school. I just bought my first house and decided to have a family dinner, and they both agreed to come, albeit reluctantly. My brother promised to behave too. He has issues with my father. He left our mother for another woman and has been really angry with him ever since. Dinner was great, at first. My parents laughed, talked, and caught up with each other. It was like they were never married or divorced, but old friends reuniting after years apart. I was really happy. My brother, however, took it upon himself to invite my father’s mistress over for dessert!

Immediately the night went south. My mother became emotional and left. My father was choked up with anger and disgust and my brother was as smug as ever. That whole debacle took place six months ago. I’m about to have a baby shower and again my parents have agreed to come, but I’ve decided not to invite my brother. He and my mother feel like I am out of line for not including him. Naturally, I want my twin there, but I also want to be able to have both my parents there to celebrate their first grandchild. My brother won’t even promise that he won’t be up to any shenanigans. What should I do? I’m just trying to have my family together with no issues.

-Nervous Mommy To Be

baby shower hey mikey atl

***Nervous Mommy To Be, I applaud your efforts in trying to bring your family together for momentous events and attempting to facilitate healing between your parents. However, you have to accept you may never have the family you had before your parents’ divorce. This is not necessarily due to any contention between your parents, but your brother’s issues with your father. To put it simply, he has NO CHILL. What he did was downright dastardly and he deserves a cracked jaw! Nervousness is never good for any mother, especially an expecting one. The fact that he cannot look beyond his own issues to make an important day in your life a happy one, means he does not deserve to be there. It will be up to your mother to decide if she wants to come or not, but honestly your baby shower is about you and your baby. So enjoy your day and leave the unresolved family issues for a shrink. Congrats!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

10/15/2015- “Fiddling Thumbs While Rome Burned”


Hey Mikey,

My husband and I have been having issues for at least a decade now. Two months ago we decided it was time to divorce, but we have a daughter (we will call her “Rome,” sexy love Italian culture and one day want to visit there) and she has taking it really hard. It’s been especially hard since her father and I cannot get along are currently in a custody battle over her. Even though she is 16 and has the right to say who she wants to be with I desperately want my daughter living with me. Recently I walked in to find her lying on the bathroom floor unconscious. I called the paramedics and discovered she had taken pills in an attempt to end her life. Further investigation revealed that her grades have been failing, she dropped out of cheerleading, stopped attending piano classes, and had not spoken to her best friend in about 6 months. Neither her father, or I, were aware of any of this!

I feel like such a bad mother, how could I not have known this? My husband wants her to be committed, to get some help as soon as possible. I don’t feel some Asylum is the answer I said was a little spiritual guidance and some lovingkindness from her father and I, she can get through this. I also don’t want people in our business, I believe what happens the family, should stay in the family. We are now in court about this too. What should I do?  I don’t want to fail my daughter ever again, but I also don’t want strangers poking and prodding at her.


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9/16/15- “Touch The Universe”

the universe  hey mikey atl

Hey Mikey,

I seem to be down on my luck right now–like really down. I’ve lost my house, car, job, and had to move in with my mother. She and I weren’t close growing up, and I can tell she really does not want me here. I’ve always been one of those people who believed in positive energy, being optimistic, and putting good things out in the universe because that is what I want back. Lately it seems like all my good work was for nothing. I’m trying to find a little hope, but I can’t muster any. Do you have some advice for someone who has fallen out of touch with the universe? There’s got to be a break for me somewhere.

-Lower Than Job

Job The Bible hey mikey atl

***Lower Than Job, I see you’ve taken the Biblical story of Job as part of your pen name. Therefore, you should know, like he knew, that sometimes bad things happen to good people. This the nature of life and the universe to expect the unexpected and roll with the punches. Yes, a break will come for you, when it is time. Meanwhile, you must hold steadfast and keep the faith. Touch the universe and declare aloud you will survive this and thrive better than ever after this ordeal is done. By the way, you said you and your mother traditionally haven’t gotten along. Perhaps this the universe’s way of allowing you to repair that relationship. Think about it. 

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

9/4/2015- “Superhuman”

superhuman hey mikey atl

Hey Mikey,

I have NEVER been one for bullying. Throughout most of my childhood and teen years I was the victim of it. People would harass or pick fights with me for no reason. In fact, I have had my son in karate and sports since he was old enough to walk–he does not lose any fights. He’s fast, he’s strong, very athletic, and super tough. Sadly, I am getting reports that he is a bully. I tried to ignore them, but now he is about to expelled from high school. I am not really sure how to curb his behavior, he won’t open up to me. He says I would not understand. Mikey please help. I don’t want my child to end up one of those bad kids you see on the news. I know I’ve raised him to be better.

-Liam’s Dad

superheroes hey mikey atl

***Liam’s Dad, If we want our children to do right, we must first do right by them. I can clearly see what the problem is here. You raised a pet project and not a child. The way you list what he can do is like someone listing super powers. Your son is not superhuman, he is a kid who is currently bullying others. It is time to add some counseling to the list of things he has to do. The fact that he states you don’t understand him shows the root of his problems. Explore that and get to the bottom of his angst. Be his father and not his trainer. Your childhood victimization is not something he has to avenge. Yeah, you should be in front of a shrink too. #DoTheRightThing

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

8/22/15- “The Maxwell (@_MAXWELL_) Wedding Compromise”

maxwell hey mikey aatl

Hey Mikey,

How are you? I really love the advice you give to people. Keep up the good work. Well now it’s my turn. I’m getting married in two weeks and I have one big problem left to tackle–music. My hubby to be and I can’t agree on what to play. I’m pretty eclectic with my tastes in music, but he listens to Maxwell ninety-five percent of the time. I’m not a big Maxwell fan at all. My fiance keeps firing back that he let me do everything I want with the wedding–the cake, the seating chart, the registry, my dress…I explained to him the bride is suppose to have say so over all of that, but he doesn’t get it. We can throw a few Maxwell songs in, even do our first dance to one of them, but not the entire wedding. What do you think?


wedding rings and flowers hey mikey atl

***Anti-Groomzilla, it sounds to me like your being a Bridezilla! Marriage is all about compromise, so you might as well begin now. Contrary to popular belief, the wedding belongs to the bride AND groom. If all he is asking for is control on the music then you should give into that. Besides, have you listened to Maxwell? Most of his songs are extremely wedding friendly. I recommend This Woman’s Worth when you walk down the aisle and Whenever, Wherever, Whatever for your first dance. Remember the most important thing about a wedding is not the gifts, music, or even the guests; it’s two people uniting as one for the rest of their lives. Congratulations darling!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

8/13/15- “F**k The Police!”


Hey Mikey,

I’m a police officer–let the hate begin. I went to a screening of the new NWA film, Straight Outta Compton, and am really feeling upset right now. I was practically a kid when the group first came out, and like so many others my age I too yelled “Fuck the police!” when the song came on. I know now that was wrong and disrespectful. Nobody believes there are any good cops anymore. I’m really feeling this movie is gonna bring about a new wave of anti-police sentiments among the youth and I don’t support it. My sister and nephew are going to see it tomorrow when it comes out. As her brother, who is a cop, I’ve voiced my opinion about the film and she’s still gonna take my fifteen year old nephew to see the film. I don’t feel she supports me or is willing to see anything from my point of view. She says I’m overreacting. What do you think?

-Nobody’s Pig


***Nobody’s Pig, I saw the same film you saw and it was not completely anti-police, in fact I consider it to be anti-oppression! The cops in that film clearly abused their power and NWA’s Fuck The Police is a clear reaction against that oppression. There are good and bad cops, but this acts of brutality are making more and more people uncomfortable. The biopic your nephew and sister are seeing tomorrow is just an edited reenactment of a series of life events of a few men. Eazy-E, Ice Cube, and Dr. Dre are not the judge, executioner, and jury on any cops. Don’t make the same mistake of law officials from nearly thirty years ago and label a fight song as terrorism. Besides, it is just one of a myriad of controversial songs they released. Remain “Nobody’s Pig” and be a great officer! However, this is a fight not worth having with family. Make like Elsa and “Let It Go!”

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

8/1/2015- “Bayou Blues Over Gumbo”


Hey Mikey,

I really don’t know how much longer I can stay married. My mother-in-law hates me and she shows it every chance she gets. My husband and I was a tourist from Atlanta passing through Jean Lafitte, Louisiana. My ex-roommate wanted me to see her hometown. My husband and I met and really hit it off and for about a year and a half maintained a long distance relationship, taking turns visiting each other every month and talking on the phone every other day. I really loved him–I still do. However, when I moved there to be with him his mother was not happy. She doesn’t feel I fit in with his family because I’m educated and a lawyer. The women in his family are housewives or retired. She says I’m boojie because I don’t like frog legs, gator, squirrel, rabbit, or a lot of the “local cuisine” there. My husband does, and he is allowed to cook and/or eat it himself, but when I make food it’s for he and I to eat. So I’m going to make what we both like.

On holidays all the women (including her other daughter-in-laws), except for me, are allowed in the kitchen to help cook or prepare food. She won’t even let me boil rice. My husband suggested I cook a meal she likes so I made some gumbo with rabbit meat in it. Something I know she likes and even followed her recipe. She really enjoyed it until she found out I cooked it. Then I witnessed her pouring it down the garbage disposal…my heart broke…My husband stood there laughing and shaking his head. Not once did he speak up for me. I’m not sure what else to do. I’ve tried talking with her, reasoning with her, and compromising. Nothing works. I left my whole family to be here with him. Maybe it’s time I move back to Atlanta.

-Absurdly Bothered


***Absurdly Bothered, there is nothing absurd about how you feel. Your mother-in-law sounds jealous, petty, and hateful. Honestly, I think a lengthy vacation to Atlanta is just what you need to clear your head and figure out your next move. However, before you go on sabbatical let your husband know how you feel. Remind him of his marriage vows, and the little line where he promised to keep you “for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, and forsaking all others, be faithful only to her, for as long as you both shall live?”

While you’re away really take your time to consider your options and consequences. If your husband is not going to speak up for you, then I see a situation that will only worsen. Just think about how things would be if you had children? Would she alienate them too because of you, or try to under mind your position as their mother? All of these are things to think about. Darling, you’ve got some thinking to!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡