9/13/14- “Because I Loved Myself More”

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Hey Mikey,

I’m lost right now. I’ve always put my husband’s career and needs before own. He’s a lawyer and at times I’ve functioned as his wife/personal assistant/secretary. Now, I’m ready to go back to school try and become a businesswoman in my own right. He’s completely against it saying I won’t be able to perform my “wifely duties.” I got accepted to Spelman and instead of being happy for me he filed for separation. I can’t understand why he doesn’t understand I am trying to better myself and in the long run it will be good for us and any children we have?

-Shaken

***Shaken, don’t find yourself “shook.” Wanting to better yourself is always admirable and noble. This is the only life you have, live it as best you can. If your husband does not understand that loving yourself more does not mean you love him any less; then he’s the one with the problem. Congratulations Spelman is a great school! Get that degree and become the woman you were always meant to be. Remember a woman is more than a wife or help mate. In fact she’s more than what any man would make her to be.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

9/9/2014- “Before You Walk Out Of My Life”

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Hey Mikey,

I really like your site. Lots of categories and stuff. My husband in particular likes your “Hot Tips for The Handsome Man” column. He gets manicures and pedicures with me now. Well my marriage is great but my friendship with my friend, “Elaine,” is really strained. We’ve been girls for about five years now and she was even in my wedding.  We recently had a big fallout over this slime of a guy she’s been dating. He makes Nikko from “Love & Hip-Hop Atlanta” look like a saint! To make a long story short,  she has not spoken to me since and now she’s accepted a job offer overseas and will be leaving in a few days. She had a going away party and did not invite me. Should I leave things alone or try to get some reconciliation and closure before she heads off?

-A Hurting Friend

***A Hurting Friend, I am sorry you and your friend are going through this. I see so many women lose great friendships over men.  It’s all so disappointing. Nevertheless, I advise you to reach out and wish her well. You can even tell her you have no hard feelings about the situation.  Anything she decides to do, or not do, after that is solely up to her.  Lose no sleep,  shed no tears! Life moves on and apparently so is your friend.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

9/2/2014- “The Raw Dog Rebel”

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Hey Mikey,

My current boyfriend and I have been together for a year now. I’m generally happy with him and I feel like I’m falling for him more and more everyday. So…my problem is in our sex life. He wants to start having raw sex and I definitely don’t. I’m negative and he is too but still I think it’s gross. He says if I love him and want to be a good partner I’ll at least try it, but I’m just not with it. Is there something I can do to get him to realize all that is rather dirty. I’ve seen videos and I’m not with the clean up. Tell me something good Mikey I’m counting on you!

-Gay Boy Issues

***Gay Boy Issues, this is rather intense!  I mistake, this is not something you can compromise on. Either you are going to do it, or not. I think you two should have a serious conversation and you should express your discomfort with the action. I would rather this not be a deal breaker in your relationship,  but the moment you start bringing ultimatums into the bedroom things are definitely going downhill. Never let anyone push you into doing something you are comfortable with.  Remember what one guy won’t do for you, another one will!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

8/21/2014- “The Universal Solution”

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Hey Mikey,

Currently I’m overwhelmed with two problems in my life. The first being my mother. She constantly asks me for money, promises to pay me back, then scolds me for being a disrespectful daughter when I have to ask for her to pay me back. To further complicate my life, my boyfriend and I are so on and off repeatedly, that I don’t really know where we stand anymore. He says he loves me and I do love him too but I don’t think I wanna try anymore. Every time he asks for another chance I just wind up taking him back. What should I do to move past all this? I don’t wanna alienate my mother or force my boyfriend out of my life.

-Feeling Powerless

***Feeling Powerless, you alone are the most powerful person in this situation.  You should exercise that aforementioned power with the simple use of the word, “No.” That’s right there’s no book or law or rule that says you have to give your mother money or keep taking your boyfriend back.  The Universal Solution to pain is on the edge of your tongue just waiting to be spoken and fix your issues! Remember our problems end and begin with us.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

8/15/2014- “It Doesn’t Have To Be A Snowman”

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Hey Mikey,

I’m feeling really flustered right now. My teenage son recently came to live with me and things are really awkward between us. Most of his life I have been a traveling businessman and he with his mother. She recently passed and he’s had to move in with me. I’ve slowed down a lot on traveling to work on building a relationship with him, but he’s really distant. I’ve even tried doing some of the stuff with him he liked as a kid. I’m not surprised he does not like that stuff anymore, but I am beyond baffled. Is there anything you can recommend I do to bring us closer together?

-Just Don’t Know

***Just Don’t Know, where there is no relationship you must began from scratch. He’s acting like a stranger to you because that’s what he is. You’re going to have to get to know the teenage son you have and let go of the little boy you remember. He’s lost his mother, and as his surviving parent he needs you very much right now. I recommend you take “Frozen’s” Princess Anna’s approach and “build a snowman.”

This is only a metaphor, as I am actually advising you to do bridge the wedge between you two by trying something you both like to do. If there isn’t an interest you both share I suggest trying something neither of you have ever done before. It makes for great memories and bonding. Remember,  you’re his father, your son should be no stranger to you than your own heart. Try, and try again with him, NEVER GIVE UP. He’s worth it…

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

8/10/2014- “Mama Knows Best!”

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Hey Mikey,

I’m really upset with my wife right now. Our daughter, who is only seven, started her period this week! She is way too young.  I want to get her checked to be sure she has not become sexually active or molested. Her mother, my wife, absolutely refuses to let me have a doctor check her out. She says some girls naturally start their cycle this age,  but I feel like she’s dismissing my concerns. She’s even threatened to leave me if I don’t back off and follow her lead. I don’t know what to do. I’m torn between doing what is best for my daughter and keeping my marriage in tact. I love both of them.  What should I do?  Am I the bad guy here?

-Protective Dad

***Protective Dad, your wife is going overboard by threatening to leave you. However, you are not the bad guy here but you are the agitator! A young girl’s first menstruation (a woman’s period) is something she needs her mother for. As a man you cannot possibly imagine what she is going through. If you were being an excellent father instead of just a protective one you would research what factors can cause early menstruation instead of jumping to conclusions.  A simple Google search will reveal everything you need to know. Apologize to your wife, let her take the lead in this situation, and fall back! Your daughter needs your understand and support right now, not your instrusion. I agree she should go to a doctor to be checked out, but not for abuse, but to be informed and ensure there are no deficiencies within her. Be wise!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

8/8/2014- “Spiritually Self-Medicating”

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Hey Mikey,

My friend of twelve years has turned out to be a complete backstabber. I find out he has been sleeping with my girlfriend for the last three months.  I feel so stupid!  All the times I’ve left him home with her and let him stay over they been kicking it right under my nose.  I threw both of them out.  It’s easier to get her out my life but,  he and I are different.  He’s left like a thousand messages asking me to forgive him and for us to talk but I don’t know. … Mikey what should I do?  I’m sure you’ve dealt with betrayal of some sort before.

-Dead Inside

***Dead Inside,  allow me to resurrect the inner sanctums of your heart and soul.  You have been dealt a monumental blow that will take some time to heal from.  It’s time to offer yourself some healing in the form of forgiveness.  Forgive yourself and then the two of them.  Accept that you may have been the catalyst that brought them together, but their indiscretions are faults all their own. Now forgiveness does not mean you have to be around them,  or treat things the same. It instead allows you to spiritually self-medicate to heal and move on with your life.  You don’t wish them harm,  you don’t wish them well–you move on. 

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡