1/26/2014- “The Modern Uncle”


Hey Mikey,

How are you man? I’m hoping the advice you give will help me make the proper decision when it comes to my niece. My brother, unfortunately, is a dead beat dad. My niece is now three and she has seen him a total of four times. Her mother and I get along pretty well and she has been asking me to spend more time with her,  but I am a little hesitant. First, I think her mother is sweet on me, and second, I don’t want to overstep my bounds and be playing daddy to my niece. At the end of the day my brother’s her father. What should I do? I don’t wanna let my niece down, or upset my brother.


***Pluto, Man up! Your niece needs you! From your own admission, you have told me your brother is a dead beat dad. What is the harm in being a super uncle to combat some of the negativity her father’s absence can cause in her life? Let her mother know you are not interested in anything romantic with her and move forward. Call me “the modern uncle,” but I believe it is the role of aunts and uncles to provide supplementary care and balance in the lives of their nieces and nephews. I have taken a similar outlook in the relationship I have with my own nieces and nephews by becoming what they need me to be. Where your brother is lacking or failing you must rise to the occasion. Having a strong male/father figure in her life can prevent her from having sex too early, teen pregnancy, etc. I am sure if this situation were reversed you would want him to step up for your child. I’m counting you to do the right thing…she is too…


My niece, Aairess and I

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡


1/16/2015- “Centuries”


Hey Mikey,

I’ve been obsessed with celebrities for as long as I can remember. I think I like the longevity of their careers and the impact they have on the world at large. I recently began pursuing an acting career and have been moderately successful, scoring two cameos in big films and two commercials coming out this year. I know I’ll be famous but I want to be legendary like King Arthur, Thor, or Dr. King! How do I make my name immortal? Any advice?


***Starchild, I am so hearing Fallout Boy’s “Centuries” in my head as you explain your dream of becoming legendary. Honestly my advice is to continue to pursue your dreams. No one really knows if they will become legendary or not. Mortality, unfortunately, amongst many ails grants us an expiration date. So no knows how long or if they’re name will endure the years. Live in the moment.  Become the best you that you can be, accomplish all your dreams, and be able to look back on a life without regrets. If you can do those things when you’re old, fragile, and gray then you’ve already attained a feat that very  few in time and space can also claim. Good luck!



☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

1/11/2014 – “No Male Zone!”


Hey Mikey,

I think I have some serious issues when it comes to other guys. I recently celebrated my 25th birthday and as I looked around I realized I have no male friends. When I think about it, anytime I have tried to be friends with another guy something terrible has happened. For instance a guy I was friends with slept with my girlfriend behind my back, another stole money from me after I let him stay with me for a week, and still another came on to me. By the way, I don’t have a problem with gay people. But, I was hoping that he and I could have been good friends. When I offered that, he backed off. Do you have any advice on how I could form meaningful friendships with other men?


***Q2, usually this story goes the other way, a girl has a problem making female friends because she doesn’t trust or has had negative interactions with them. My advice for you is to put yourself back out there with other guys. Apparently, you have ran into a few bad apples, but that doesn’t mean the whole bunch of men are jerks! No matter what any guy says, brotherhood is a necessary component of manhood! Take it slow, find a guy who first just wants to be friends; and then presents himself as a friend. Remember your friends should be as diverse as your life experiences, so you definitely need to have at least one other guy in the mix. I’m just keeping it 100! Good luck in your search for bromance!


☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

1/1/2015- “A Pretty Boy’s Resolution”


Hey Mikey,

I spent New Years Eve and Day alone. It definitely is not because I did not want to do anything, but because no one invited me out. Everyone I spoke to today admitted they did not invite me out because they thought I would have made plans with someone else. I guess I am too much of a social butterfly and it helps that I am attractive. I use to professionally model. Still, I don’t want this happening every holiday. How do I make myself appear more available to people. I think that’s what my New Year’s resolution will be. This is getting ridiculous Friday nights and holidays are becoming rather dull due to how people perceive me. When did being me become so…lonely?


***Hugh, Happy New Year! I am sorry your New Years was so blue, but thankfully (and hopefully) you have 364 more days to enjoy yourself. Listen, quit with the “pretty boy problems.” Stop placing your good times and experiences in the hands of others. Master your destiny and take command of your time. If you want to go out, GO OUT! Your resolution should not be to change yourself but to be proactive. There is no harm in including yourself in others’ good times, especially when it is a friend or someone you are interested in. By the way, if you ever find a Friday night or holiday to dull you can always party with the girls–Margarita, Tequila, and Corona! 

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

12/26/2014- “Blue Pill Christmas”


Hey Mikey,

So first of all, Merry Christmas brother! I like your site and advice. Keep up the good work! As you know, yesterday was Christmas and for the most part it was good. I was really blessed this year and was able to get my parents, siblings, girlfriend, nieces, and nephews some really nice gifts. Everyone took care of me too–including my girlfriend. Her gift I feel went a little too far though. It was a prescription of Viagra! I opened it in front of my family thinking it was a new hand controller for my X-Box, or that dark Dolce & Gabbana I told her I really like. But no! There it was, and I unwrapped it in front of my entire family. I was visibly upset and embarrassed and I could see in my family’s faces they felt the same way for me. My girlfriend just popped up off the sofa, hugging me saying now we can have some ROCK HARD Fun! I’m like what the f***!? I’m only thirty-seven and we’ve never gone less than thirty to forty-five minutes when we’re having sex. The way I reacted to her was giving her the cold shoulder and silent treatment for the rest of the night. We even got in an argument this morning because she wanted me to take one of those little blue bastards. How can’t she see this isn’t cool? I’m ready to drive her ass back to Mississippi! What should I do? What would you do?

-Embarassed As Sh**


***Embarassed As Sh** I’d like to wish you a belated Merry Christmas too. I’m sorry you holiday was ruined by this sole inappropriate act. Let me be clear she is absolutely out of line! That is not the type of thing you gift to anyone, especially at a family gathering. What if you had given her something to make her vaginal area moist, or some sex toy in front of her dear old mom and dad? i’m sure the reaction would have been far less fun or funny. What I would do is not important. I do not handle embarrassment well and she would be dropped off at some random MARTA spot on Atlanta’s West Side. Now, as for you, explain the situation to her from your point of view. Let her know the anger, embarrassment, and disappointment you and your family felt when you opened your gift. Go on to explain to her that your sex life is restricted to your bedroom or home and is not to paraded around family and friends, no matter how comfortable you feel around them. Take those “little blue bastards,” as you so affectionately call them and send them to the watery grave in your toilet. I surely hope this will not be a make or break issue for the two of you. If it is, it is her loss! Trust me the water is again your gateway to happy days, it contains plenty of fish who will not need help from a bottle of pills to get off!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡


12/18/2014- “Shawty…He Don’t Mind…”


Hey Mikey!

My little brother is in a relationship with a stripper! Yes, a dirty, dancing, slut bucket, nude for cash ass stripper! What’s worst is he met her at a church gathering. She did not tell him she was a stripper upfront until they got serious. I feel she should have told him before and her lying is going to be their downfall. He acts like he does not have a problem with her doing that but I know no man wants to be with a girl who dances. It is just too much. He needs a rude awakening as to how life works. What would you suggest I do to snap him out of his reality and get him with a good girl? No one in my family is going to accept her and I am not gonna keep her profession–if that’s what they call it–a secret from our parents for too long!

-Freakin’ Disgusted

***(singing) Shawty…He Don’t Mind…(stops singing) Freakin’ Disgusted your name should be “Freakin’ Nosey,” honestly this is none of your business. Your brother’s love life is his alone to control and navigate. You and the rest of your family should stay in your lane. Be concerned, but do not be delusional in thinking you can or have the right to try and split them up. Your brother obviously does not have a problem with her dancing and neither should you. Nowadays people talk about strippers like they talk about serial killers, and it is getting to be a bit much. Remember, love and the outcome thereof, is a decision left to fate…


☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

12/8/2014- “Bye Felipe”


Hey Mikey,

This on again and off again status relationship between me and my boyfriend, Frank, is really pissing me off! For the last two months he has broken up and gotten back together with me at least every other week. He has broken up with me for picking him up five minutes late, baking chicken instead of frying it, and once for not having an ugly sweater for some “Ugly Christmas Sweater” themed party. I CAN’T! I feel like I have to be doing something for him to nitpick every single thing I do. Help me out here Mikey. Am I the crazy one or is he?

-Desperately Disheveled

***Desperately Disheveled YOU ARE BOTH CRAZY! Obviously you never heard Taylor Swift when she sang, “…we are never ever, EVER getting back together!” Either he is very petty or very controlling, neither are a good look. This needs to be done once and for all. Have a candid conversation and tell him you are going to be together and committed or you will not be anything. No sane woman will be with a man who checks her about not having an ugly sweater for some equally ugly party! Girl, it is hard to be a healthy individual when you are surrounded by bullshit. Move on! There are plenty of men with better fashion sense, cooler parties to attend, and won’t give you the drama Frank, I mean “Felipe” is causing. So “Bye Felipe!”


☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡