6/22/2014- “Commitment Under Pressure”

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Hey Mikey,

I recently moved to Atlanta from Cincinnati.  Before I left I was dating this guy. We broke up because neither of us wanted anything long distance. Now I just found out he has moved down here for his job and he wants to pick up where we left off. I don’t think I want to though. I feel like I wanna date around and see what Atlanta has to offer in the Men’s department, lol. Still I feel like have to date him too. I mean we were pretty serious. Just don’t know if I’m ready for a commitment. What should I do?

-Fresh A-Town Girl

***Fresh A-Town Girl, you don’t need my advice. You’re asking for permission to move on with your life and honestly only YOU can give yourself that power. If you don’t want a committed relationship right now then don’t be pressured into one and play the field. However, I will advise you to be a good girl and let this guy down easy. He clearly likes you to want to restart things now that he’s down here. It’s not cool to string him along with dates and allowing him to think something is going to happen between you two. This is your life darling, take control of it!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

7/9/2014 – “Her Brother’s Keeper”

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Hey Mikey,

I’m having what some people call a crisis of conscience. Last year my ex – fiancé and I called off our wedding because I found out he had been messing around with other guys. When I say messing around I mean having penatrative sex with them. Needless to say it broke my heart. Just when I think I’m getting past all this a little my little brother announces he is going to marry his longtime girlfriend. The only problem is I know he went through a gay phase when he was like 12. I caught him grinding on one of his male friends. It’s a secret I’ve always kept between us but I feel like his fiancée should know. Should I tell her or try to get him to? Somehow she needs to know there’s a possibility her man, my brother is gay.

-Anonymous

***Anonymous, this is a very tricky situation, but it is not the dilemma you are making it out to be. Think back and remind yourself just how young you and your brother both were when this happened. This is not all too uncommon. People forget that sexuality is fluid for both men and women. Just because someone does something once it does not mean they are prone to do it again. The laws of experimentation dictate you try it to see if it is for you or not. Honestly, the real issue is you have not dealt with the issues surrounding the demise of your own relationship. You are still trying to punish your ex, but foolishly attempting to do it through your brother. I advise you to allow yourself to forgive your ex and seek professional counseling. You’re making decisions with a clouded head and broken heart. Darling…that’s never a good look.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

6/24/2014- “The Eighteen Year Itch!”

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Hey Mikey,

I been with the same girl for 18 years now. I met her in middle school and she’s been my one and only since then. Now we are both about to turn thirty and I’m beginning to feel like I’ve missed out on some other experiences.  She’s the only person I’ve ever been with romantically and sexually, and although I do think I want to be with her for the rest of my life, I also want to be appease my curiosity about being with other women. Honestly, I do wanna take a break to explore that but I don’t wanna lose her forever in the process. What should I do? How can I make both us happy?

-Curious Landon

***Curious Landon, to put it simply you cannot have your cake and eat it too.  There’s nothing wrong with being curious, but is it really worth risking your relationship over? Being apart of someone’s life for eighteen years is no easy feat. In fact, very few marriages last that long nowadays. However, if you must explore other options then yes you two do need to take a break. Nevertheless, I forewarn you that this decision may have consequences you do not foresee. She could move on, you could fall for someone else, or the very nature of your relationship could change forever. There’s honestly no real way to make both of you happy when in a situation like this. Be prepared for someone to get hurt. 

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

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Michael "Mikey" Fanning; creator and owner of "HeyMikeyATL"

6/21/2014- “The Right Time”

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Hey Mikey,

Great advice. I have a question for you. How soon is too soon for “I love you?” I can see a great future with this guy Im dating but dont want to rush things.

-Far Too Gone

***Far Too Gone, there is no right or wrong time. It is a matter of having the courage to truly express how you feel.  Nevertheless, I caution you to truly know that you feel this way and really understand what love is. You’ll know when it is truly unconditional, when his needs come before your own, when you know you will be whatever he needs. With that being said, just because you feel this way does not mean he does too. Be prepared for him not to say it back. If this does happen it is not the end of the world or your courtship. Some people fall in love slower or quicker than others. Live in the moment knowing he knows how you feel. The rest is up to him.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

6/7/2014- “Diamonds…Are A Guy’s Best Friend?”

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Hey Mikey,

So…my fiancée and I are kind of nontraditional. She approached me when we met, she pursued me, and she even proposed to me. Everyone thought her proposing to me was wierd but I really wasn’t surprised. She’s a go getter and that’s what I love about her. What I don’t like is how frugal she’s being.  She also went ahead and bought our wedding bands. Hers is diamond studded and mine…zirconia. I’m sort of a trendsetter and hate anything fake. I want to get a new ring but I know she’ll feel a certain way about that. What should I do?

-Engaged & Envious

***Engaged & Envious, yes your fiancée is definitely a go getter. There’s something powerful about a woman going after she wants and getting it. You definitely prove diamonds can be a guy’s best friend too! Seriously though, you both should have the rings that you want–within reason. Find a happy medium between what you want and what’s she’s given you. Keep the ring but swap the zirconia for real diamonds.  That’s a reasonable compromise. Remember the rings are merely symbols of your love. Don’t let this minor monkey stop the showboat of love headed your way. Congratulations!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

5/29/2014- “She REALLY, REALLY Hates Me!”

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Mikey!

Help!!! This psycho ex-bitch I once called my wife is ruining my fucking life! I know we are going through a divorce, but she never acted like this when we were married. Most of the time she seemed really quiet in Temple, now she’s doing everything she can to make my life a living hell. She is trying to take both of my classic cars that I personally restored, is coming for the inheritance my great grandfather left for me, refuses to let me see our son, and even told my mother about how I got molested as a child before I could reveal it to her. Like she really,  really hates me. My homeboys think this is all an act to get me to stay with her. Do you think so? I definitely wouldn’t have married a woman like this. This just can’t be the real D—–!

-Currently On Guard

***Currently On Guard,  this is a highly appropriate pen name. However, I have to ask are you surprised? Divorce brings out the ugliness in many people. That to me, shot I want me you think you married is possibly now scorned and ready to make you feel exactly the way she feels. Stop taking advice from what your home boys think, and get yourself an attorney specializing in family law. That’s what this has now come to! Your material possessions are a little concern to me, however, your son’s well-being should not be caught in the crossfire of his parents’ shenanigans. Man up, and stop underestimating her! You said it yourself, she really, really hates you.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email at HeyMikeyATL @gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

5/28/2014- “Cosmic Poison”

Cosmic Poison

Hey Mikey,

I’m going through my first heart break. This girl I really like, damn near love, is in love with my best friend. He likes her too and now they are dating. It is gut wrenching to see them together. I keep wishing it was me. When I approached her she said she didn’t want to date, a boyfriend, or a relationship. They meet and its like instant wedding bells. It’s not his fault though, he didn’t even know I approached her. People, including, my family keep discounting how I feel saying I’ll get over this, that I’m sixteen and it’s not the end of the world, etc. But I feel this changing me. I’m starting to hate my friend and actively avoid him. I want them to break up and for it to hurt. Never felt this way before–don’t wanna feel this way. He asks if he did something wrong, but I just keep brushing it off. Should I tell him? And what do I do about these feelings? What really happens when you are brokenhearted this long?

-Rotting

***Rotting, you sound more jealous than brokenhearted. Beware, jealousy is “cosmic poison” and what you feel changing is your emotional and mental state. All negative side affects of this toxic emotion. I can see why this is hard for you to deal with. Sometimes rejection can cut deeper than any knife. However, she has the right to choose to be with whomever she wants, that person just so happened to not be you. I advise you to put some distance between you and your friend until you are able to talk about what you’re feeling. Reading your letter makes me wish I could write a letter to a sixteen year old me and let him know no matter what happens, or how long it takes his heart will heal and that rejection is not an eternal experience. I’m going to give you that same information. Give your heart a break–time is your sole ally here. Find something productive to focus on and then master it. Love, and the pursuit thereof, is an arduous yet rewarding experience–ALWAYS be open to it!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

 

5/23/2014- “Standing Frozen”

Queen Elsa from Disney's "Frozen"
Queen Elsa from Disney's "Frozen"

Hey Mikey,

I’m kinda going through a lot right now. I got a new job offer  in New Orleans. It’s kind of my dream job and def means more money. Still, my family and ex-boyfriend are here. I’m close with my family and my ex is hinting that he wants to get back together. We had a bad break up, but we still kick it with each other on and off. I know if I leave I’ll be out there by myself, but I kind of do want to get away, my past in ATL holds a lotta bad memories for me–deaths, disappointments, heartache, etc. Do you think I should move? I know it’ll be the end of he and I for sure if I choose to do so. From his own admission he’s “not good at long distance anything…”

-Still Standing, But Scared

***Still Standing, But Scared; your pen name should be “Standing Frozen.” You  cannot allow events and people from your past keep you from moving forward to the future. Right now you’re at this weird apex in the present and it doesn’t seem like you’re really living or falling apart. You have said this opportunity in New Orleans is your dream job and you should go for it! Your family, if they’re sane, will support you doing better. As far as your ex, no one can live their life off “ifs,” “maybes,” and “mights.” He is your ex for a reason, remember that. Trust me darlin’ if it’s meant to be it will definitely work itself out. Queen Elsa sang it best when she sang, Standing frozen in the life I’ve chosen…You won’t find me, the past is so behind me…” Have a beignet for me!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

5/15/2014- “Love, War, & Fangirls”

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Hey Mikey,

My fiance and I are really into anything Syfy. Superheroes, comics, video games, we love it ! In fact, our mutual interest are what really made me fall in love with him. Things are usually great between us, but recently he’s made a new friend and I don’t like the bitch! She’s a fangirl too, and now she’s become a frequent third wheel on anything we do! Whenever she finds a reason to touch my fiance she does! I personally pull her to the side and ask her does she have feelings for him. She claims that she did initially, but when she found out he was engaged then they just became platonic friends. I ain’t buying it! I want her gone, how do I accomplish this? Whenever I bring up anything about her slightly negative to my fiancé he brushes it off.

-Future Hitgirl

***Future Hitgirl, your suspicions definitely warrant investigation.  Feigning friendship while subvertly planning to steal someone’s mate is more common than you think. Let your Beyonce know how she initially felt about him, and why that makes you uncomfortable now. Ask him if the situation were reversed would he be comfortable with you having a new friend that used to like you and is now a third wheel in your relationship. Trust me, no man would go for that! If he changes the situation with the girls, that he’s one step closer to becoming a husband, if not I think you have a few other things you need to reevaluate if you catch my drift! Remember darling all is fair in love and war, don’t just lie down when you suspect someone is trying to disrupt your relationship.

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡

5/13/2014- “This Thing I Can’t Do Without Her”

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Hey Mikey,

My girl left me. She left me, with no notice, no explanation, ever no reason whatsoever. Its like we were happy on a Tuesday, and then on a Wednesday she was gone. I don’t know what I did or why she would leave, I’ve never cheated on her and I give her everything. But I’m so depressed, I don’t think I can do this thing without her. I don’t feel like life is worth living, or going on if I don’t have her with me. Everyone says that there is someone else out there for me but I can’t even see that, they also said the grass is greener on the other side but I can’t even see the grass due to the tornado she’s left in my life. What should I do my key? How do I find out what happened between us? I’ve been obliterated. ..

-Falling

***Falling, I beg of you after reading this to consider getting some professional help. This “thing” you can’t do without her is called life; and believe me you definitely can! Everyone, is going to tell you that there is someone out there for you and that you will get past this I will say the same thing. However, I will also give you some peace. You may never find out why she left until she actually decides to let you know, and whether she does or not you can help yourself by allowing yourself do not take the blame for the situation, accept the apology from her you will never receive, and begin to make the necessary steps to remove the remnants of her from your life. Into your life is a very selfish move. Not just for you, but for everyone who loves and cares for you! It’s the equivalent of dropping a bomb in the middle of someone’s living room. ALL life is precious, especially your own!

♢Suicide is never an option! If you need help, or feel like you’re going to hurt yourself please contact the national suicide prevention hotline immediately. Someone does care, especially me! Need help?

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
1-800-273-8255

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post. Be sure to pick a code name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey♡