3/23/2016- “Can I Come Over?”

can i come over ey mikey atl

Hey Mikey,

I am wondering what is my next move with the guy I’m currently dating. We have been dating for two months now and I want to step things up. When we are together we are usually going out somewhere, or with friends, and now I’d prefer a more intimate setting like my home, or his. He will come into my house to pick me up or say goodnight, but he does want to sleep over, let me come over, or have sex.

He says he will let me know when the moment is right and that he wants to be the “aggressive one.” Now I’m not pressed or a slut, but a girl has needs. He and I have a great time together, but a good time just is not enough when I’m craving sex and to be touched. My ex-boyfriend has been hitting me up a lot lately. He is definitely a jerk, especially when compared to my current guy, but his sex was bar none! My current guy and I are not committed to each other yet. Should I dabble with my ex and just continue seeing him. AGAIN, not trying to be a slut!

-Vexed in Chiraq

can i come over hey mikey atl

***Vexed in Chiraq, there is no need to worry, I will not slut shame you; and that term definitely should not apply to this situation. You’re obviously a woman who knows what you want and when you want it; and there is nothing wrong with that at all. However, other people also have the right to move at their own pace and comfort level. There could be any number of reasons that he does not want to have sex yet; i.e. abstinent, low sex drive, not in the mood, ad infinitum.

Since you two are not committed, and if you are really wanting to have sex, I would suggest SAFELY feeling your needs with someone else.  NOT with your ex, however! He’s your ex for a reason, and he should stay that way. It’s 2016, and it is a woman’s right to choose who and when she has sex. I’d advise you to let this sex buddy be someone you know you will not fall for, and keep things as light and casual as possible. Good luck!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

3/8/2016- “His Penis, Her Community Property”

sexting hey mikey atl

Hey Mikey,

I am having a serious issue with my girlfriend of three years.  She has totally violated my trust, and I am not sure how we can recover from all of this. Pretty much I went on a business trip to San Diego, and while I was away I asked her to send me some sexy pictures of herself– some new ones. She bought some lingerie and did that; and then asked for some nude pix of me in return. I agreed, that’s my girl, and we sext all the time. I did not think anything of it until my cousin forwarded me those exact  pictures from a gay site; telling me there were pictures of me posted online.

I know I only sent those shots to my girl so I confronted her. She immediately begin to cry, apologize, and revealed she had been forwarding them to her friends–one of them is a flamboyant ass gay dude–bragging about my piece. These pictures have my face in them, and if they reach my corporate office or a client sees them I could be ruined. Is there anyway to erase them off the net? And what should I do with my girl? I’m not homophobic but I don’t want gay dudes drooling over my dick!

-Dicknapped

sexting hey mikey atl

***Dicknapped, BREAK UP WITH HER NOW! You cannot build with someone who has no forethought of the consequences of her actions, or the emotional maturity to know this is wrong. Unfortunately, the rule of the internet is once something is out there–it’s out there–and you cannot take it back. All you can do is learn from this and NOT put your face in nude pictures. That is the number one rule of “Sexting 101.” As far as the gay site goes, contact them and let them know your pictures are being used without your permission. Just keep in mind, so that you never go back this woman, that your dick now belongs to the net!

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

 

2/14/2016- “Demetria’s 100” (@demimckinney)

demetria mckinney hey mikey atl

Hey Mikey,

This has turned out to be the worst Valentine’s Day. The guy I thought was going to be my Valentine has completely cancelled on me. We  met two months ago and hit it off really well. He told me he was looking for a relationship, now suddenly today he says he’s changed his mind and us spending Valentine’s Day together would just give me false hope. It’s leap year so I’ve made reservations at a restaurant, and even bought him this Burberry cologne that he really likes. I don’t know what to do, but I feel cheated and stupid–cheated of my time and stupid for falling for him. Now he’s texting me saying we can at least have dinner. What should I do?

-Feeling The Worst

***Feeling The Worst, follow my exact orders. Block, delete, and remove him from your phone and all social media. Your heart is not some play thing for him to put down and pick up. Although it is his prerogative to change his mind, he has handled this situation poorly. He should’ve taken a lyric from Demetria McKinney’s “One Hundred” and kept it real with you (Currently humming the song in my head).  Save yourself some heartache, have a nice dinner by yourself or with a good friend, take that cologne back and get you a refund, and enjoy a new love–self love! Happy Valentine’s Day! 😙

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡

From The Pages of OUT Magazine (@outmagazine)–Jussie Smollett (@jussiesmollett), “‘I Am a Gay Man. I Am a Gay Man. I Am a Gay Man”

jussie smollett out magazine hey mikey atl

Fox’s Empire is still the hottest show in the country and we have, in part, Jussie Smollett to thank for that. The thirty-one year old actor who plays the middle son of Cookie and Lucious Lyon, Jamal, has one hearts one line and one song at a time since the show’s debut. Today, he steals more hearts as he covers OUT Magazine, discussing his view of himself as a gay man and relationships:

jussie smollett out magazine hey mikey atl

“I am a gay man with an extremely open heart. God, I’ve never had to talk about this, so I’m trying to find the words. If I had to label myself, I would label myself as a gay man…With that said, I believe that love is the only thing that matters, and I would hope that anybody would leave themselves open — not to gender, but to love. I would hope that people would not close themselves off from what could be if, lo and behold, you meet somebody that just sweeps you off your feet, and you just can’t do anything about it…If we truly believe that we are born this way, then why do we try to stifle the way we were born? If I fall in love down the road with a woman, I’m going to love that woman.”

jussie smollett out magazine hey mikey atl

As you recall, last March, Jussie officially came out to the world via his appearance on The Ellen DeGeneres show following his “sort of outing” by former cast mate, Malik Yoba. Either way it takes a lot of courage to discuss who you are and why you love who you love. Jussie’s words and decision are commendable. Be sure you grab the latest issue of OUT Magazine “out” now!

jussie smollett out magazine hey mikey atl

Taboo to Do: Sex on the First Date?

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When it comes to relationships, there are many things one may deem taboo to do – like asking a guy out on a date, letting the lady foot the bill and one of the oldest in the book; having sex on the first date. But it is now 2015 and I hereby deem all of these things outdated and unrealistic. For instance, there’s this really cute guy you’re crushing on and he flirts with you too. Instead of you asking him out, you wait on him to do it and that day never comes. Why are you waiting on him to make the next move? The same thing with falling into bed with someone.

My personal opinion is this – I believe that after twenty minutes of meeting someone you know whether or not you like them and if you want to have sex with them. You know whether you want to continue on a conversation with them or if you’d like them better with their mouth closed and clothes off. Today I’ve compiled a list of why I think it is perfectly fine to “smash” on the first date.

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7/2/2015- “Confidence Meter–TURN IT UP!”

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confidence level conceptual meter

Hey Mikey,

I really love your advice column and I figure you can help me out with something. I’ve started to date this guy in the last week. He is very intelligent, kind, has great communication, but he lacks confidence. A few years back he was obese and his dating life was virtually nonexistent. Even though he has lost weight and looks great can’t see it, and wants to lose more weight. I tried to get him to have a meal with me later in the evening and he declined because he says it wouldn’t help his wait loss–he also would barely drink with me. I’m not the most fit guy myself, but I like to have fun and be able to say what I want to say without having to worry about hurting someone’s feelings. His low confidence worries me. I’m considering no longer dating him and advising him to work on himself. Should I?

-Actively Searching for BAE

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5/20/2015- “Too Hard To Be Light-Skinned”

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Hey Mikey,

I’m not sure what the f***is going on lately, but the hate on light skinned dudes is real and HIGH! Just the other day this girl said she did not know how to take me because I “act too hard for a light skinned guy.” Like what the hell does that mean? Then just today a girl I really like said the only reason girls nowadays get with light skinned guys is to have pretty babies. Am I dating the wrong girls or is this the trend because everyone’s telling me they’re right. As a Black man I have enough to deal with without having to prove my blackness based on the tint of my skin. What should I do to deal with all this?

-Anti-Color Struck

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***Anti-Color Struck, your situation is a sad and ignorant one. I want to say these are isolated incidents but lately I too have met a number of lighter skinned African-American men who tell me the stereotypes, prejudice and disdain they have faced just because they are not darker skinned. Do not let this get to you. Honestly, it is beyond you and as old as the slavery itself. History lesson: Lighter skinned slaves were the master’s children and lived and worked in the house and did not have to do the harder, menial tasks of darker skinned slaves so they seemed softer and less threatening. Translate that to present day and some people assume because you are light skinned you are weaker, not quite as Black, or do not know the meaning of a hard life.

Cut these girls off and toss their ignorance to the side. There is someone for everyone and they are only showing their insecurities. The measure of any man is how he governs himself, not the color or shade of his skin. They are stupid and color struck–not worth your time and thoughts. Yell out loud, “IDFWU!”

☆Need advice? Simply leave your question in the comments section of this post, or email me at  HeyMikeyATL@gmail.com. Be sure to pick a pen name! Thanks for checking me out! -Mikey ♡